One Strange Cookie

God amazes me more and more everyday. He pushes me further into this leadership role even though I am terrified and have no clue what I'm doing. But its through that fear and uncertainty that He is able to shine and most be glorified. He also works better then because He is in control and not me.


I never thought that I would be seen as a..."radical Christian." As a matter of fact, that term used to get to me. I'm not saying it doesn't still make me weird now, but I think I'm starting to identify somewhat with it (maybe). Just a little. My goal is to follow Christ and do His will. His mission for my life is for me to lead people to that very way: to lead them into a lifestyle that is modeled after His own heart and to be readily obedient (even though I myself have not even semi-mastered this concept, but I am trying). I have to say though, the looks and the response one gets from attempting to live this seemingly radical life can be rather...disheartening. 


This verse came to mind:

“If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first.If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you.Remember the words I spoke to you: ‘No servant is greater than his master.’ If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also. If they obeyed my teaching, they will obey yours also.They will treat you this way because of my name, for they do not know the One who sent me." - John 15:18-20

I'm no greater than Jesus. How can I expect to lead others and not have people look at me strangely or dislike me because I'm not fitting into their ideas. I have to go with it. For someone like me who loves to love others and to have fun; for someone like me who likes to meet people where they are, this is a very hard pill for me to swallow. That people will discount me because I choose to live this way. Because of my belief alone, I will be cast aside. This isn't just by the people in the world, but the people in the church.


As disheartening as this is, I can't imagine living any other way. I can't sacrifice my God and the love I have for Him for the ideas people have concerning the way I should live. God's tugging at my heart and calling my name...how can I not answer Him? For me, it would only create more heartache and discord. 


He is the light of the world & I intended on following Him...even if I must succumb to the idea of being hated/disliked/viewed as strange.